Don’t network. Connect the dots!

Why I hated networking

When I started going to these startup events I was very shy, did not know whom to talk to and what to talk about.

On the contrary, my male friends seemed to feel at ease at such events and could just naturally talk to new people. Most importantly, they did not just talk randomly to some people but were always very strategic in the decision of whom to approach and what to talk about. I never was like that and consequently, I felt I sucked at networking.

Even though, I love meeting new people, I felt stupid after doing so. First, because I did not know what to use the newly acquired connection for. Second, I felt I could not offer anything in return and this made me wonder whether they would want to talk to me again.

Today, I see networking in a completely different light. Here is why:

What is your mission?

A few weeks ago, our founder, Simon, declared that he wanted to get rid of job titles at Ginetta. Instead, every team member should come up with a personal mission statement in three words. I have thought about my life mission intensively before, but to put it in three words?! This sounded kind of impossible. A few days later, Simon told me that he had it figured out for me: “Connecting the dots.”

Two things came to my mind: On the one hand, Steve Job’s wonderful talk and on the other hand, these strategic networkers who claim to connect the dots but instead just collect tons of business card and superficial connections on Linkedin. Obviously, I did not want to be labelled as one of those and therefore, wasn’t quite convinced of this mission statement. Anyway, the seed had been planted.

What means connecting the dots?

After that, I started thinking: “What means connecting the dots to me?” Many connections came to my mind:

On July 1st 2015, 8 female entrepreneurs graduated from our 6 month-mentorship program. Two mentees in particular thanked me personally for connecting them with their mentors:

• Anna wrote a great business plan, won startup competitions and got a CTI project.
• Fernanda got a workspace and found a great potential co-founder.

Moreover, I connected:

• Jacqueline who is aspiring to have a career in employee engagement to Sunnie who has a startup in that field. Consequently, Jacqueline could write her thesis for Sunnie.
• Tanya who is passionate about hosting shows, to the local TEDx-Organizers who were looking for a new host.
• Domi and Kamil who are both excited about solving the same problem. Consequently, they started working together.

There and then, I realized that I had successfully connected the dots many times. And that it filled me with this good warm feeling.

Connecting passionate people with others and as a result, they create amazing things together.

That is what connecting the dots means to me.

Why I enjoy networking

All of a sudden, I realised that it’s not necessary to see connecting the dot in the light of this strategic networking behaviour, which I hated so much. I am convinced that connecting the dots is rather about listening to people’s needs and helping them to be successful. And if you help other people, eventually, you will gain more than you could have asked for.

My learning

The point is, you can never know where you will get together by first meeting a new person. So it is OK not to know immediately, what to use a new connection for. I am convinced, it is even impossible to know.

Knowing this, I stopped feeling bad about being unclear what to use a new connection for. Instead, I just enjoy meeting a new person, curious to discover where it will lead.

Like Keith Ferrazzi teaches in “Never eat alone”:

“Don’t network. Make friends!”

Today, I am more confident at networking, because I know I have something to offer: an open ear and a helping hand, to connect you with some dots in my network.

I hope I may successfully connect many more dots and you see networking in a more positive light now.

Let me know: what do you think about connecting the dots?

Let’s connect! You find me as @melakovacs, makerschat.com or just shoot me a good old email.